Monday, September 22, 2008

Excuse Me

Although there is a phrase, "sillyehamnida," which is always translated as "excuse me," I recently found out that it doesn't mean what we think it means. In English, "excuse me" can be used in a ton of ways: to get someone's attention, to make them move out of the way, as a response to bodily functions, as a way to express disbelief, as an apology, etc. In Korean culture, it's used as a pre-apology, for when you're about to do something bad.

I was discussing this with the Korean boy I met in Seoul. We were getting on the escalator in the subway station, and I stepped onto the left side. Apparently that side is meant to be used for people who are walking only. Standers stand on the right. It's not surprising; they do that in airports all over, but I hadn't encountered that here yet. I guess it's more important in the subway stations, since people are in a hurry. My friend pulled me to the side so this guy could pass. I realized then that he had been standing behind me, probably getting pissed, but didn't do anything about it. I complained about how Koreans always suffer silently when all they have to do is say "excuse me." He said Koreans don't have a phrase like that, and I asked about sillyehamnida. He said that doesn't mean the same thing. It's supposed to be used when you're about to do something that you need to apologize for, and I guess it has to be really bad. Like, "Excuse me while I stab you." I said, well, even though making someone move or get up to help you isn't really bad, we still say "excuse me" to be humble and polite. But he said it's just not the same.

Now that he told me that, I've been noticing a lot more how people seem so rude by Western standards. They push each other in hallways, on elevators, on stairs; yell what they want at waiters instead of calling them over first; and don't give bumping into someone or stepping on feet a second thought. It's amazing living amongst so many people and being able to completely ignore all of them.

The thing that kills me, not really because they don't say anything, but because it's easily avoidable, is that people are constantly bumping into me or brushing by me when I'm completely surrounded by loads of clear space. I want to shake them. Why don't they just walk one foot to the left or something? They really don't see anything, I think, but their destinations. Any soft tissue in the way is inconsequential.

Now that I think of it, I don't think I've ever heard anyone say "sillyehamnida" or do anything to replace "excuse me" since I've been here. It's interesting to see how dense populations and a communal culture will affect people. I must say, though, the Borg never run into or push each other like that. Why isn't Star Trek more popular around here?